B A Start

Star Wars Status Updates: A Response

2010-08-27T15:25:00.003-05:00

Please find below a Facebook status update exchange re: Alderaan. Don't believe the hype. (Other than mine, names changed to protect the foolish.)

Mike Wines

Please put this on your status if you know,or are related to someone killed on Alderaan when it was obliterated by the Death Star. My wish is that people will understand that the Empire is a band of murdering scum. The Rebel Alliance wants only to bring peace to the galaxy, but the evil Empire continues to kill innocent civilians. 93% won't copy/paste this. Will YOU make this your statusforat least one hour?

Alex Livingston

I don't normally talk politics on FB, but you have drawn me out with your conspiracy theories.

An entire planet destroyed by a battle station? A man-made moon? This baseless nonsense has been sent around the galaxy in forwarded emails and treated as if it were fact. The explosion of Alderaan is the greatest tragedy in recent memory, and marginalized political groups trying to bend the facts to suit their ends is shameful.

Fact: The only accounts of the "obliteration" of Alderaan via a mysterious "Death Star" come from terrorists.

They allege that they destroyed this massive station and killed everyone on it. No witnesses -- convenient.

Fact: Until the Alderaan event, no one had ever heard of this alleged moon-sized battle station.

What purpose would a Death Star serve? Why would Coruscant pay for something that large when warfare is known only to history? Who would they use it against? Not the systems, surely. Why would the Empire destroy its own tax base? Any pirate threat has never required more than a few twin-ion-engine pilots to bring to an end.

Fact: Only days before the Alderaan event, the archaic and bloated Galactic Senate had finally been dissolved, with authority over the systems being moved to regional governors.

After the sad end of Alderaan, this "Death Star" story was invented by the elusive terrorist organization. They play on the fears of the citizenry -- the breakdown of the Empire into chaos. I urge you not to take the incendiary rumors sent around by gun-toting backwoods types seriously.

Mike Wines

Your points are all very interesting Alex. However, you failed to address one small issue. Where's Alderan?

Alex Livingston

The planet of Alderaan is gone. The exact cause remains in the realm of conjecture (a fact the terrorists are all too happy to exploit), but I am much more inclined to believe that some kind of massive geophysical disaster destroyed it than that the government blew up a weaponless planet without cause or warning.

The reduction of the planet to asteroids is very telling -- what kind of technology exists that could do such a thing? The Death Star "argument" infers that the Empire not only built a base of unprecedented size in complete secret, but also developed a world-destroying weapon under the same cloak. The term "far-fetched" does not even come close. Again, what would be the use of such a weapon? The Empire has no enemies; we are one united galaxy. And the only people with anything to gain from making us believe otherwise are the terrorists.

Bill Kelly

Fortunately, i did not have any family on akderan, however, I did have 2 sisters and their families contracting on the new DeathStar. They were lost in the newest terrorist plot, which has also brought about the end of our peace abd the demise of our fair and beloved leader, Palpetine. So, now I ask you, are the murdered parents of my neices and nephews the same merciless scum that you so vehimently prosecute? I think NOT!!! they were innocents! i think you should rethink your stance, sir, before you offend one more likely to draw first!

Alex Livingston

Mr. Kelly -

Thank you for your letter. I write to you from prison, placed here by your illegally installed new senate, may the blood never be washed from their hands. My unflagging loyalty to the Empire and the iron oath I swore to defend her have made me an enemy to the dandies who now swarm over beauteous Coruscant. After Endor, I did not skulk in shadow as was the wont of the terrorist; nay, I spoke my fidelity, knowing it would place me here.

It truly saddens me to hear of the untimely passing of your sisters. While the tears of one called "traitor" may not serve to assuage your family's pain one jot, I extend my condolences nonetheless, and I beg you to accept them in the spirit they are proffered.

I hope it is not too painful to set your memory back to the last days of the war, but I must ask -- how came your sisters to work on what you call the "new DeathStar" (sic)? To my knowledge, women did not serve in the Imperial Navy, an example of the humanitarian leadership under which those soldiers fought and bled. The Death Star was built by the Navy Corps of Engineers, military men all. Civilian contractors never set foot on the base.

There is a legend of the noble Lord Vader's first visit to that ill-fated space-station in which it is told that the officer who received him promised that his men would work overlong to ensure its completion before its grim purpose need be realized. His men, not civilians.

The construction of the battle-station was a brilliant coup by my beloved Empire. The success of the fallacious rumors of a Death Star (maudlin name, really) put the Navy in a position where to not build one would seem to be weakness. How could the good people of the Empire feel safe if the greatest technological marvel ever built had been destroyed by a band of angry criminals? The Navy needed to build a better one to assure the public they were well-protected, and so they did.

The world-destroying laser beam was an impossibility, of course. A large cannon was built into the base, but it was meant to be used only for the harassment of capital ships. The myth could go only so far.

The terrorists won that day, and what choice did the people have but to celebrate? The statue of our fair Palpatine on Coruscant was torn down not out of joy, but out of fear. Who would dare be called "loyalist"? Very few, I assure you.

As for your offer of a duel, I must play the part of coward. Even were I free, I would decline; I abhor blasters, you see. My pacifistic conscience was allowed to flourish under the Empire, but I'm afraid the new world - built on the bodies of honorable Navy men - cleaves to violence too much for me. Even from my cell I have heard rumors of a return of the order of the Jedi, the thugs of the old senate. They state themselves to be peacemakers and ambassadors, but I ask you what needs a diplomat with a sword?

All I can ask is that you think on what I have written, as I have thought on your note. And as for your challenge, I offer an alternate -- a duel of spelling.

Bill Kelly

Mr. Livingston, firstly, allow me to apoligize for my typing... i never claimed to be a typist, and attempting to do so on a qwerty cellular comlink occasionally ends poorly, however, I MOST CERTAINLY AM ABLE TO SPELL. Secondly, you were not the subject of my violent outburst. That being said, you most certainly may step onto the field should you so desire. you claim to be a pacifist? Perhaps,sir, you are the reason that your beloved empire has fallen!?! Lastly, you state that there were ni civilian contractors? Were you there? you assume truth in all that you read? If so, I have an entire wikipwdia volume for sale at a very reasonable price!!! Forget, never for a moment, that history is written by the victor. My sisters and their husbands were in fact "civvies" in the project which was so very ill fated. It is the likes of you, the "sheep" mentality, accepting all that is laid out nice and neatly for them that has ruined this galaxy for all time.

Bill Kelly

I appologize for my candor, alas, it is late and the Corrillean Ale, and my emotions, have gotten the better of me. Perhaps, when next we speak, it will be of happier tidingd. Adeiu

Alex Livingston

Thank you, Mr. Kelly, for your correspondence, and for proving my point for me.

The New Blog

2010-01-01T14:48:00.000-05:00

You can find my latest posts here: http://thegamerlifestyle.blogspot.com

You know. Like a sword

2009-12-17T15:05:00.010-05:00

I've been tooling around with Double Edged, a nice-looking, simple flash game over on Nitrome. It's pretty much just head right and slash at the baddies, very reminiscent of the old 8-bit games. I can help but wonder, though, what would this game have been like if it were released for the NES?

No Way, No How, No Saving

After sliding the big gray plastic Double Edged cartridge into the NES, the lucky player would have been given three lives and quite possibly a limited number of what us classic gamers remember as "continues". If you wanted to beat this badboy, you better have slated a whole afternoon and better not ever make a mistake. Or maybe you would get some unintelligible passcode which your brother would write down for you. You know, the kid whose "A"s and "E"s look exactly the same.

Oh yeah. This shouldn't be problem at all.

Now, Double Edged has twelve levels, or more correctly three levels and twelve save points. Short, I grant you. Just remember that Castlevania had six.

The graphics would be much closer to awful

Is this the face that launched a thousand titles?

Pixel art has come a long way since Kid Icarus. Just playing as a character made out of more than nine little squares was a life-altering event. And shading? Utterly jaw-dropping.

Here in Double Edged, not only do we enjoy well-crafted sprites and scenery, but we even get to enjoy multiple levels of moving background! And the characters have shadows!

The mountains move! Devilry!

You'll take 2 axes, and you'll like it

How'd you get up there?

Whoa, wait. You want to press up and move FARTHER AWAY? You are blowing my mind.

In NES land, you will go left, right, or nowhere at all. Better find a way to jump that box, because there's no going around it.

"Well, I'm stumped. You win, Joker."

A Few Points

For reasons that make little sense, the already-limited screen would have a points counter on it, hovering above you, as untouchable and judgmental as St. Peter. You know, so you could take a polaroid of your highest score and show it to your buddy Jay next time he came over. At least now you can shoot for an online leaderboard.

Yep, it just keeps ticking away up there. Kinda creeps me out.

That music will be stuck in your head for a very, very long time.

Red X, you are beauty.

So, somewhere along the line somebody figured out that not everybody likes chiptune? Being able to shut the damn music off is one of the better game developments in recent history. Sure, I like synthetic stylings as much as the next guy, but hearing the same eight bars on a loop as you repeatedly get killed by the same boss is just rubbing 8-bit salt in the wounds.

Now how much would you pay?

Minimum wage in the eighties was $3.35. NES games were fifty bucks. Nitrome.com is free. It's a wonderful time to be alive.

The First Party Polo

2009-12-02T18:44:00.003-05:00

Ever give a gift to someone out of the blue? The sentence "hey, man, I got this for you" when uttered some time other than the Designated Gift-giving Holidays elicits a strange response from the recipient, a bitter cocktail of shame and terror. Fortunately, we have the holiday season, a socially-acceptable chance to act on those altruistic urges.

Buying for a gamer can be... let's just say "frustrating". The Geek Nation is known for having oddly specific tastes, and trying to pick up a game, accessory, or other such notion is fraught with the sort of Christmas peril usually reserved for Eastern European folklore. So, what to do? Our friends at Penny Arcade have a solution.

Some four years ago a posted an open letter to the suburban-trend-machine Hot Topic, asking, nay insisting they reconsider their marketing strategy as relates to gamers. A series of brilliant points were made about the fact that gamers aren't all kids and that many want something more subtle, but their nascent genius died on the inter-vine, apparently.

From the open letter:

Here is what I would like to see from you: a series of unassuming polo shirts with corporate logos embroidered on the right breast, but the logos are from the evil corporations from various videogames. For starters, whip a few for Shinra Incorporated, Datadyne, and the Umbrella Corporation.

Too subtle, perhaps, but the concept holds. Stop giving us puerile junk. What is needed is some sort of gamer polo shirt. You know, for grown-ups.

Enter the First Party v1.0 Launch Polo. Nice sharp shirt. Understated gamer logo.

At last! We can wear our colors with pride, not gaudy ostentation. A shirt for that day when your office holiday party and buddy Jonesy's LAN party are scheduled back-to-back.

You see polos with tennis rackets, golf clubs, skis, sports franchise logos, heck, even an actual polo player from time to time. And finally now we see something for the more sophisticated lover of the virtual lifestyle.

Now, the in-one's-face style of gamer swag has its place, certainly. In fact, it can be rather rad. But it is nice to have an option. Sports fans have enjoyed this luxury for some time, and I can only hope the First Party shirts are a harbinger of better days.

Better than Nothing - Cognitive Surplus and Gaming

2009-10-03T07:42:00.002-05:00

We've got time. So much free time. For the last fifty years, we've spent it watching sit-coms, but not we've started to do something else. We're making Wikipedia and Lolcats. And we're playing Warcraft.

You should read this article, the main thrust of which is that we are starting to figure out what to do with the vast amount of free time we as a society have, and that the people who craft the future will be the ones who do just that. The issue of gaming comes up briefly:

In this same conversation with the TV producer I was talking about World of Warcraft guilds, and as I was talking, I could sort of see what she was thinking: "Losers. Grown men sitting in their basement pretending to be elves."
At least they're doing something.

Did you ever see that episode of Gilligan's Island where they almost get off the island and then Gilligan messes up and then they don't? I saw that one. I saw that one a lot when I was growing up. And every half-hour that I watched that was a half an hour I wasn't posting at my blog or editing Wikipedia or contributing to a mailing list. Now I had an ironclad excuse for not doing those things, which is none of those things existed then. I was forced into the channel of media the way it was because it was the only option. Now it's not, and that's the big surprise. However lousy it is to sit in your basement and pretend to be an elf, I can tell you from personal experience it's worse to sit in your basement and try to figure if Ginger or Mary Ann is cuter.

Are here we come to a main difference between Our People and non-gamers -- interactivity. We don't want to yell at the running back, we want to control his movements. Seeing who ends up being The Biggest Loser is not for us; we want to train our own characters to succeed.

And as everything people see and touch becomes more and more interactive, we recognize that the world is finally starting to catch up.

Turn to the left

2009-09-26T08:58:00.002-05:00

Geeks don't really know much about fashion; aside from T-shirts and glasses, we're pretty much lost. You've seen the guys who work in IT -- you know it to be true. But do the fashionable know about video games?

Enter Charlotte Ronson. No, I didn't know who she was either.

Ms. Ronson, a fashion desiger, is collaborating with Nintendo on Style Savvy, an upcoming DS game slated fora November release.

From Nintendo's website:

Style Savvy combines creativity and fashion with a collection of trendy clothes, chic accessories and stylish shoes. As the owner of a clothing boutique, you must purchase inventory, monitor the store’s funds and try to please a constant stream of customers who look to you for the best fashions.

What's the game going to be like? Don't care. What I do care about is pictures like these:

(source)

(source)

A VG device used as a fashion accessory? Nails painted Noble Blue to match? I thought gamers were all supposed to be mouth-breathing weirdos. Aren't I supposed to be embarrassed to own a DSi?

Something called "Fashion Week", which I assume is some form of festival related to clothing and cigarettes, took place recently, and Ronson held an after-party featuring several DSes and a preview of the Style Savvy game.

From here:

Charlotte Ronson knows how to put together a good show on and off the runway. Following an edgy SS 2010 collection, the designer threw a party where celebs drank Svedka cocktails and previewed a new fashion boutique game called Style Savvy from Nintendo DS and DSi. (The yet-to-be released game will launch later this year so you won’t have to wait long!) Erin Lucas, Tinesley Mortimer, Kirsten Dunst, and Avril Lavigne were all glued to their Style Savvy shopping and styling outfits. It’s only a matter of time until we see this cute little game in every fashionista’s hands as they frolic in the park, travel on the subway, and sip their lattes at Starbucks.

I'm assuming we aren't going to see hand-helds incorporated into any challenges on Project Runway any time soon, but any press is good press when it comes to normal adults gaming. No, games aren't just for children. No, gamers don't all talk funny/smell funny. Yes, videogames are cool. Even the people who decide what 'cool' means think so.

Super Star Trek -- Neolithic Gaming

2009-09-18T18:07:00.003-05:00

“Retro-gaming” is a highly-mutable term. Pulling out the tangle of cords that is your old Atari 2600? Retro-gaming, certainly. Blistering your fingers on that old NES controller? Sure. But how about the PS one? The Gamecube, even?

Semantics aside, there can be no doubt that logging some time with Super Star Trek counts as retro-gaming.

Yes, that’s an actual screenshot. A far cry from this, yes?

I first heard about SST when I was a young kid and my dad would tell tales of playing it on some massive old rig at work. (“During breaks”, of course.) Various incarnations of this game could be found on various boxes and home computers throughout the seventies. It was distributed for home use the old-fashioned way – by publishing the complete BASIC code in a magazine. A few hours of careful transcription and you were ready for… what exactly?

What on earth would motivate a modern gamer to keep playing this thing after a few curious moments? Sure, download a new version, tool around a bit, have a laugh. But to actually play? What could this code-snippet possibly have to offer?

It comes down to three aspects, few of which remain in today’s games.:

#1 – Turn-based play. Sure, it’s still out there, even on consoles, but there’s not much of it around. Spending some time with a game that allows you to leave it alone for a few hours while you consider whether or not you want to use your last photon torpedo on that distant klingon warbird (represented by a capital “K”) has a completely different feel. SST combines tactical turn-based play with the map size and freedom of a larger-scale strategy game.

#2 – Randomness. As you direct the Enterprise (that’s the “E”) around the charted galaxy, just about everything can go wrong. You are quite often yanked across the board by a “tractor beam” and placed in the middle of a firefight – not good if you’re on your way to a starbase (“B”) to reload. Sometimes the transporter will just flat out fail without warning, and the last sound your away team will hear is Scotty wailing that he’s losing them. A star (“*”) in your sector can go nova and toss you across the map like an empty can of Tab. Etc. And when I say “etc”, I mean it; much of the strategy in this game is focused on how to prepare for the worst that merciless random-number-generation can deal out.

#3 – The promotion system. Every lasting game needs a rewards system, and in SST it comes as a notification that you have been promoted to the next difficulty level. Sure, you could start at the hardest setting or keep on riddling away at the easiest, but getting the word that you have saved the Federation and are ready for harder trials makes the challenge all the more fun. When the player reaches the Expert level and scores well enough, the program will print a plaque. That’s right – something you can hang on your cube wall to show the world how awesome you are at Super Star Trek. Smitty over in networking will never live it down.

A large part of my personal enjoyment of this game comes from the hard-core, early-days-of-computing, Soul of a New Machine feel. After few rounds of typing in your commands (“pho 3 2 1 5 4 8 7”, for example) and squinting at the box of numbers and periods that serves as the starchart, you’ll feel your sideburns growing and your shirt sleeves shortening. There’s a romance to that green-texted era, the first time in history that true geekiness could be used for something other than HAM radio and Monty Python references. This is the time of legends, when Our People began. Which is why I can’t help but feel a flush of embarrassed pride over this:

Download it here.

The New Play (pending)

2009-08-11T10:37:00.002-05:00

What the heck will my next play be about?

For the purposes of my own writerly development, I want it to have few characters, possibly all female. I know who they are, and I know what their problems are with each other -- I just don't know where to put them.

My tendency is to go nerdy. Magic. Swordfights. Etc. Trouble is, while fairies and witches were all cool for Shakespeare, they come across as a little D&D nowadays.

So, am I actually going to find myself writing a modern family drama? If the set calls for a couch or kitchen table, please slap me.

Yes it is he.

2009-07-14T17:00:00.006-05:00

Last night's RLTP discussion included a reference to one of my favorite games -- Prince of Persia. Not the fancy new wall-running version (though I enjoy that, too),

but the original DOS game. I reacted predictably.

The part in question was what I'll refer to as the Dark Prince. He shows up a little bit into the game when you are forced to jump through a mirror. This shadowy version of yourself runs off without any sense of what his deal is.

The next time you encounter him, you fall to what seems will be your death. As you stand on the precipice, he could help you. He doesn't. Or does he just react too late?

Before you face the evil vizier, you must face the Dark Prince. He's at a fairly unassuming place -- no big arena or dark cellar. He's just there in a hallway.

Try as you might, you cannot defeat him. Each time your sword reaches past his parrys, you are hurt. The only way to pass him is to sheath your weapon.

What a great nugget of narrative, especially considering the source. Aside from the don't-fight-puzzle near the end (very Arabian Nights), the Dark Prince doesn't add much to the game-play, but he certainly prompts an emotion. What is the developer saying with the Dark Prince? More importantly, what interpretations can the audience bring? You must face and accept the darkness within yourself, since fighting it will not work? Is he evil? Fear? Your opposite, or a part of you?

Here's a speed-run of the whole game. The screenies above are from (3.08), (3.49), and (8.27).

Wordle

2009-06-23T17:51:00.005-05:00

Oh, wordle. Where have you been? Allowing anyone to make art out of text? Awesome. How can I resist?

Beginner's Luck -- the new space play.

Alpha Geek -- last year's play

B A Start

My Twitter account

I'll tell you one thing -0 I say 'just' a lot.

Stuff Only Alex Cares About

2009-06-19T16:22:00.002-05:00

Thing the first.

I'm pretty sure I remember someone in the DVD documentaries for the special edition of Fellowship of the Ring saying that Tolkien invented the word "wraith". Imagine my surprise, then, when I read a quote from F. Scott Fitzgerald using the word. Fortunately, someone is handling this for me.

Thing the Second.

Nice try, Mountain dew with this commercial.

Doesn't hold a candle to this:

Thing the third.

After reading this post, I really am disappointed that my brother didn't propose to his fiancee on Warcraft, though I am wondering if there will be a ceremony in-game. For the record, I am a priest.

Thing the last.

The Rock Band forums have a post dedicated to the analyzation [sic] of the Beatles cinematic. A few good catches in there.

The Beatles: Rock Band Cinematic -- Annotated

2009-06-04T17:16:00.029-05:00

If you haven't seen the opening cinematic of the upcoming The Beatles: Rock Band, you really ought to. Here's my attempt at annotation. This is mostly from memory, so please feel free to contribute.

update -- contributions have been labeled with initials.
latest update 6-7-09

We start off in Liverpool, with the Fab Four playing at The Cavern Club, the bar in which more or less had their beginnings. As we pan down, we get a lingering glimpse of posters featuring the names of several songs and lyrics.

Hard Days Night (title)
Come Together (title)
Benefit of Mr. Kite (title)
Rocky Raccoon (title)
Maggie mae (title)
The Revolution (title -- Revolution #1 and #9)
Carry That Weight (title)
Mr. Moonlight (title)
(MG)

St. Peter's Parish Church is where Paul met John. (TRB)

Dizzy Miss Lizzy (title)
Twenty Flight Rock (Eddie Cochran song Paul later covered)
The Blackbirds (title)
Blue Jay Way (title)
Maggie Mae and the Word (titles)
The Diamond Buyers (if it makes you feel all right) (lyric, Can't Buy Me Love)
Jeremy and the ? (character from Yellow Submarine)
(TRB)

Rock & Roll Music (title)
(JK)

The Meanie Blues (reference to the Blue Meanies from the Yellow Submarine movie)
My favorite reference here is "The Semoline Pilchards" (lyric, I Am the Walrus).

Out on to the street in avoidance of throngs of screaming teens (which, if I remember correctly, was the plot of Hard Day's Night). And, wouldn't you know it, there's an Old Brown Shoe (title) in the alley.

The dash includes this shot:

Based on this photo:

Next up, a road featuring Maxwell's Silver Sundries (song title, Maxwell's Silver Hammer) and a fireman, who I assume likes to keep his fire engine clean (lyric, Penny Lane). Maxwell Edison was majoring in medicine (lyric), and perhaps thus the Surgery sign. Also look for the lizard outside the window (lyric, "lizard on a window pane", Happiness is a Warm Gun)

I believe there's a stack of pennies on the lane (or sidewalk) underneath the fireman. I'm willing to bet the WANTED poster is Bungalow Bill (notice the pith helmet). (TRB)

And poking his head out of the hole in the ground in which he sleeps is Mean Mr. Mustard (title, lyric). (TRB)

Duck into a restaurant, whose menu is surely all references. "Fish and Finger Pies" is from Penny Lane, and Hippy Hippy Shake is a title -- tough to read much else, but there's clearly more. The restaurant lists mostly items from "Savoy Truffle," but also includes "Honey Pie." (TRB) "One and One is Two" is a title, as is "Mean Mister Mustard" (above the door). The Grapes was one of the Beatles hangouts.

An Abbey Road (album cover). Where's Paul cigarette? On the left in the back, the horse with the H blanket is Henry the Horse from "Mr. Kite" (TRB) I think the mailbox on Abbey Road is actually a newspaper vending machine for the paper "What Goes On" (title) (TRB)

And who's that in the background as they get in the car? It could only be Lovely Rita, meter maid. (title) Without the bag across her shoulder she doesn't look very much like a military man, but she can give us a wink anytime.

And a gift basket from Strawberry Fields Farm (title) in the car. How nice!

It even includes a green apple, which is the logo for Apple Records. (MG)

Next up, the arrival in the States. Also, a yellow submarine (title, movie) can be seen in the river. (MG)

I'm fairly certain the sound of the plane as it lands is from Back in the USSR.

Note the accurate clothing.

On to the Ed Sullivan show.

and some other venue. (Anyone?) The typewriter's got to be a Paperback Writer reference, right?
Next up, Shea Stadium.

Shea Stadium signs...
P.S. I Love You (title)
Paul, I Wanna Hold Your Hand (title)
(JK)

And then things get... a little weird. Sgt. Pepper uniforms appear on our favorite moptops.

Note the Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds (title) on the left. Can we safely say those are eggmen on the right? (lyric, I Am the Walrus)

Here's a fellow whose stomach says Goodbye and Hello (title). Is the "stupid bloody Tuesday man"? (lyric, I Am the Walrus)

The piano on the left of this shot is from the promo video from Strawberry Fields Forever. "I think the audio equipment in the English Garden is from the outdoor recording sequence in Help! as well as the silver teapot (Buckingham Palace scene?)." (TRB) Needs verification

Is this a newspaper taxi? (lyric, Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds)

There's a very brief glimpse of the top of the giant drums, which shows they are the drum from the Sgt. Pepper album cover, (JK)

The costumes from I Am the Walrus.

A quick shot of a Blue Meanie (from the Yellow Submarine movie). Are these elementary penguins? (lyric, I Am the Walrus -- TRB)

And this last shot of them... so familiar but I'm not sure from what. Anyone?

Perhaps the pose at least comes from this. The order of the boys and color of their pants are correct. (TRB)

The Beatles are riding the elephant god Ganesha: Lord of Success at the end. (TRB)

Fairly certain the last note heard is the second to last note from "Day in the Life".

Also of note: The game drops on September 9, 2009. Is that a shout out to Revolution 9? ("Number 9... number 9... number 9...") (MG)

Thanks to Todd, Garv, and Johnny K for excellent contributions.

Get "In God We Trust" off the money.

2009-05-16T12:10:00.003-05:00

To say "In God We Trust" is to say that there is a "we" of unified belief in a deity. This is not true.

If I were to put a poster of a swimsuit model up in my office, this would be deemed harassment. I would have created a hostile work environment for my coworkers without saying a word.

Perhaps not the best metaphor, but the same goes for putting "In God We Trust" on our money, having our schoolchildren declare their allegiance daily to a nation under God, and having prayer open Senate sessions. By doing these things, we are saying "not welcome" to people who do not believe in the monotheist's god. It is exclusive, divisive, and contrary to the spirit of our nation.

My opinion that "In God We Trust" should not be on our money is not founded in ungodliness, atheism, or any anti-religious sentiment. All people most certainly have the right to relate to the divine in any way they choose. It is for precisely that reason that our government's actions should not put one belief before another. You don't have to believe in the Judeo-Christian god to be an American. Thus the "We" is a misnomer, and makes people feel as if this country does not want or respect them.

The issue of what the founding fathers wanted is one of fervent debate. I posit that it doesn't really matter one way or the other. These are people who decided to keep slavery legal and that women shouldn't vote -- their opinions on social matters don't carry as much weight as they used to. If the whole lot of them had signed a document that clearly said "we're a Christian nation", I would say that we should throw that doctrine away.

Alex

2009-05-07T19:10:00.002-05:00

A relative of Her Worshipfulness's says I look like Ben. I took me several iterations of this to realize she meant not some relative or friend, but rather Ben Affleck. Now, the veracity of this observation aside, it brings to light a social development which I simply do not understand: reference to celebrities by first names only.

How do you know which Jen is "Jen"? How does one receive this Kane-like honorific-free honor? Who decides? Does it change? Was it Jennifer Garner at one point? I was just at Dash's and the latest rag declared the nuptials of two people I've never even seen before, but who are listed by first names only.

Hedge Your Bets

2009-05-03T10:52:00.002-05:00

He casually scratched at his beer gut, eyes surveying the green plane of lawn he had just finished mowing. His pre-faded baseball cap basked where he had tossed it, and the sight of it warmed his heart a little for a reason he could not -- or perhaps did not want to -- quite grasp.

It was then that he knew his journey down the path towards utter domesticity was farther along than he had realized.

Steampowered World

2009-04-29T16:47:00.002-05:00

I've started a new blog project: Steampowered World. A frequently-updated compendium of notes on my travels through steampunk and Victorianism. if that's your kind of thing, stop on by.

An Open Letter to Nintendo

2009-04-22T11:34:00.002-05:00

Dear Nintendo -

It's me, Alex. Congratulations on the release of the Nintendo DSi. I have been enjoying the product thoroughly, and am excited about the future of DSiWare, the downloadable applications.

If I may, please allow me to suggest an application -- DSNotes. A simple DSiWare app which allows the user to write text documents and save them to the SD card. These could then be transferred to the user's main computer for use in other applications.

I carry the DSi with me most places, and I also carry a pocket-sized notebook. DSNotes would allow me to ditch the paper and move another need to the DSi.

Yours, as always,
Alex

My Imram Continues

2009-04-19T21:04:00.003-05:00

Still nomadic at work, borrowing offices where and when I can. The varying decor of people's workspaces continues to intrigue me. Take, for example, this high-tech piece of equipment.

Classic. My favorite part is this:
Was this really an issue at some point?

Blub blub

2009-04-16T19:08:00.004-05:00

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Bubbles -- my first foray into custom vinyl toys.

Isn't he a handsome devil?

On The Enduring Relevance of Wizards

2009-04-14T11:11:00.003-05:00

Oh, don't roll your eyes. You saw Harry Potter.

Greg sent me the story he submitted to Blizzard's creative writing contest. It A) was awesome and B) got me to thinking. What is it about wizards? Why do the children of the Geek Nation love them so? I have a theory, and it starts with a little boy named Alex.

Everyone is stimulated by intellectual activity. Everyone is stimulated by physical activity. But, when one falls to atrophy, the other increases.

As a kid, I never got into sports. I assume this is a learned trait, as I am the progeny of geeks. I spent my time doing geeky things. Video games. Computers. Reading. All this time spent in abstractions naturally led to me being pretty decent at my classes (with the glaring exceptions of phys ed and penmanship), which in turn made me the target of your standard schoolyard bullying.

Thus, physical people are bad, intellectual people are good, and there's no such thing as being both -- so said young Alex's mind. Anyone who played a sport was separate from my kind, and they certainly didn't want me around.

It took me a very long time to get past this mental division. "People can be smart AND jocks? Nonsense. One camp or the other."

So, when narrative comes into play, who is an incurable young geek going to tend towards? Rough-and-tumble heroes who punch they're way through problems (which are inevitably caused by evil geniuses)? Uh, no. Have you seen the way those guys treat the bookworms (who are only brought along to crack some code, anyway)?

Enter the wizards. People who possess the ability to interact with the physical world directly through their minds. A few mumbled phonemes from a dusty tome and BOOM -- problem solved. Ancient languages. Books. Knitted brows. These are the things I could get behind.

All of a sudden mental skills outweigh physical ones. Abused kid kept under the stairs? No longer. Now he's a wizard so powerful no one makes fun of his glasses.

But then there's the problem of Hermione Granger. So much of an egghead that other wizards make fun of her. You don't want to be like that, do you? Best get yourself on the quidditch green. Some air would do you good.

A bit much?

2009-04-11T22:19:00.003-05:00

I'm temporarily nomadic at work. A new office is being cobbled together for me, so I'm camping out at a retiree's former workspace.

She likes cats. A lot. How much, you ask?

Enough to tape a picture of a cat to the paperclip holder.

Who uses sonic?

2009-04-06T19:18:00.004-05:00

Garv and Lisa bought a house. Jess and I trundled over there to see what we could do to help during this, the first weekend of their ownership. In order to be prepared, I stuck a bunch of tools in my man-purse. Can you tell which one is mine?

Let me make it easy for you -- mine's the one with the sonic screwdriver.

P.S. Took this picture with the DSi, and I'm pretty satisfied with it.

The New Hotness

2009-04-05T21:53:00.000-05:00

I'm posting this from the Opera browser in the Nintendo DSi. My experience with the device so far has been a positive one.

And yet, still no internal document storage. Alls I'm looking for is to be able to jot a note down and to email it later. Come on Nintendo -- hear my plea.

California Pipe Dreaming

2009-03-24T16:56:00.004-05:00

Would I move to Irvine, CA for the perfect job?

Thing A) Blizzard -- the company that brought you Warcraft etc. -- is holding a fan fiction contest. Well, they're calling it a 'creative writing contest', which it is, but it's a fan fiction contest.

Thing B) Blizzard also posted a writer job for an upcoming game.

It doesn't seem like much of a reach to think that the contest is a recruitment tool, especially considering that the entry form asks for your published writing experience and if you would like to become a professional writer. Oh, and the prize is a trip out to Irvine to meet the Blizzard writers. In the HR biz, that's what we call an "interview".

Now, does this or does it not sound like THE job for your old buddy Alex? Everything I have ever had published has had to do with video games, including two VG writing-related contests.

But would I move to Irvine? Sell the house, say goodbye to casual porch nights and nearby family? Have to take a plane every time I wanted to see someone?

And what the hell would I do with the other grand prize: Frostmourne?

The march abates not.

2009-03-18T18:09:00.002-05:00

I really just can't bear it anymore. I see and hear that damned word everywhere. Iconic is not a synonym for "good" or "popular", amigos.

Today's link is possibly the worst use of the hated word to date. "Which music do you find most iconic from LucasArts' games?". Criminy. Music is iconic now?

Alex and the Calling Cards: In Which A Customer Finds Satisfaction

2009-03-17T20:31:00.004-05:00

At many points over the last year I have found myself in several situations in which having a calling card would make things easier. And not just because I'm a Victorian at heart. The magazine, the play, overtures from an art board, newfound family etc. etc. -- carrying around a slice of study paper with my contact info on it would have come in handy.

A few weeks ago, moo.com re-caught my attention. Here's a site that makes nice full-bleed cards for a reasonable price. There are a few places out there which say they make cards for free, but they look spurious at best. And Moo is in Britain. I mean, come on.

So I get to the process of making a design for myself. It should come as no surprise that I end up with a space invader. A few minutes in gimp and I've got the pattern set.

But what about color? Fortunately, colourlovers.com provides lots and lots of excellent palettes. And, based on the spelling, again with the Britishness.

And there you have it -- tiny little calling cards, perfect for most occasions. Don't be shy now -- give it a shot.

Bananana split!

2009-03-16T18:42:00.002-05:00

Has Twitter replaced blogging?

I'm seeing a lot fewer "I'm so annoyed by that guy who cut me off"-type posts recently. Facebook stati and Twitter updates (which I just refuse to call Tweets) are almost exclusively made up of this kind of content. So, why blog?

I encourage all to keep their blogs, even if you only post once week, a fortnight, a month. From time to time, you're going to have an idea which can't be easily communicated in 180 characters, and when that time comes, you'll be glad to click that rusty blogger.com link.

The good news is that when I get an RSS notification that a new post is up, it's likely going to be something more than a one-liner. Maybe constant communication will actually force us to become better writers.

That being stated, here's a funny video.

Sunny NE

2009-03-15T19:51:00.002-05:00

New Hampshire really is a beautiful place, but only if you like the deep forest. In my hometown, any livable area has been hacked from the wilderness, and is still bordered by an impassable thicket of trees. Great if the Normans invade or something,

WBER

2009-03-14T21:01:00.003-05:00

I do so love the 90. Nashua NH to Buffalo in 6:45. Also, for a decent swath of it you can listen to the only station that matters.

Here's a peep at the Clifton Springs rest area, enjoying the bleak view while I call work.

No Meaning Except That Which The Viewer Places

2009-03-09T20:28:00.005-05:00

It had to end.

Went bald as a fundraiser for Roswell. Also got the beard trimmed down to a goatee.

Looked a bit too much like a neo-nazi for my tastes. Way too much for Jess's.

Could see why badasses wore the look -- felt like a mask. A mask of badassedness. Didn't match my physique, of course. Even less my demeanor. Did people treat me differently? Or did I act differently towards people?

Either way, back to myself.
Note: I blame my lack of subjects in the above post on the fact that I read The Watchmen over the weekend. Too much Rorschach, I guess.

At long last

2009-03-03T17:36:00.003-05:00

Long-time B A Starters will remember the Great Debate over whether or not videogames are art. After much discussion and refining of definitions, my statement was "not yet". Maybe they can be, but no one's come up with anything so far that makes me say "yes".

I'm pissed at myself for not knowing anything about Jason Rohrer until Alanna lent me December's Esquire. I read the article and played Passage, and now can quite firmly state that there's at least one person out there making art in this format. (The person who made The Majesty of Colors counts too -- a post for a later date)

Before you go any further, I recommend giving Passage a play. I read the summary in the Esquire article before I played it and wish I hadn't. Still, despite knowing the point before going into it, I still had an emotional reaction to the game.

Passage provides you with choices. Do I hunt for treasure chests, or do I explore the world? Should I marry? If I do, it becomes harder to get the treasure but more rewarding to explore. But no matter what you choose, you will subtly age and die. Unceremoniously, suddenly, irrevocably.

For the first time in a lifetime of videogaming, I found myself reflecting. I have had a lot of reason to consider my choices recently -- career, personal, spiritual -- and this 5-minute game resonated with my meditations. It's an interactive Beethoven's fifth; go ahead and make your silly little choices -- fate will win and they will have done nothing to change that. All you can influence is your own experience, and try to do as much with your 5 as possible.

I'll be keeping an eye on what this gent produces. If you find anyone else out there working to communicate emotion through the interactivity of videogames, do please throw a comment my way.

VI-NAAAAAYYY!!!

2009-03-02T17:32:00.005-05:00

A heartfelt congratulations to the Benzins on the birth of their first child, Vincent.

But where, pray tell, did the name come from?

Perhaps it was Vincent O'Neill. You know, theater stuff.

Or maybe Vincent Van Gogh? They're creative types. (Apparently its pronounced Van Gokh. Who knew?)

My hope is that the littlest Benzin was named after mysterious bad-ass Vincent Valentine. I have my doubts, though.

Either way, I look forward to meeting the little guy.

Back again

2009-02-22T13:06:00.004-05:00

And once again we find ourselves talking about Neuromancer.

So, did you give Dollhouse a watch? The St. Whedon-blest Fox show featuring Faith? The one about girls who get personalities shoved in their minds to make them perfect for a job?

Naturally, this sort of technology finds itself being used for prostitution. Which is exactly how it worked in Neuromancer. Bad-assed Molly did a stint as a hooker for a while, but never remembered any of it. A program was put in her head before the session and her brain was wiped afterwards.

Until, of course, the memories started to crop back up, a device we already starting to see in Dollhouse.

This is not an anti-whedon post. This is a pro-gibson post. I mean, did the guy think of everything?

Strange Days

2009-02-17T19:53:00.002-05:00

So, it's clear there's some odd stuff happening around Buffalo. A plane drops out of the sky (to which I reacted very emotionally, if I may share. I wore all black the next day.). A man whose job is to fight Middle-Eastern stereotypes post-9/11 beheads his wife. Sick, sick, sick.

But perhaps oddest of all -- I fixed something. I fixed the treadmill. Like with tools and stuff. Granted, I then went on to nearly burn the house down a few times through sheer stupidity, but I really did fix something.

Maybe this all related to the Unitarian... service (?) I went to last week.

The Coke Ad

2009-02-04T18:54:00.002-05:00

I have been led to understand that Cola-cola is the real thing, and indeed that there ain't nothin' like it. How then, are we to take the superbowl commercial entitled "Avatar"?

You know the one. Dude is walking around the city and web-enabled people turn into their online personas. Elves, zombies, pokemen, and space adventurers go about their mundane business all around our protagonist. He finally takes a respite from his odyssey in a seat next to a big bad orc, who, it turns out is the cute girl in real life.

Is this meant to be a "book-by-its-cover" morality tale? After all, the frumpy lady is a 60's spy-movie femme fatale in the digital world. The nattily-dressed business man appears as a blue-skinned beastie. Surely our avatars, the faces which we choose for ourselves, speak much more about who we are than our offline bodies.

At about the half-way point, though, a few ironic vignettes appear in rapid succession. A pasty man in a white short-sleeved oxford shirt (the uniform of a fool in advertising) ignores a woman who struggles to get her stroller up the stairs, but turns into a superhero before our eyes. A spitting image of the Victor dog -- you remember, the one who hears his master's voice on the record-player -- bounces a sad blue ball against the leg of a boy who is apparently engaged in a particularly exciting hand-held video game. A child is dutifully pushed on a swing by a virtual supermom, who is far more interested in texting with her other hand.

So perhaps, then, the fine people at Coca-cola are saying something different. Perhaps our choices of avatar speak more about who we think we are than who we are in truth.

What, then, of our orc? She certainly seems upset when the protagonist reaches for her tasty bottle of Coke -- her green brow furrows and an angry sneer appears on her fanged mouth. Are we to assume that this young woman, who to all appearances seems nice enough in the real world, is in her mind a nasty and brutish agent of evil? Or has this gladsome prince appeared to kiss her back into the form of the princess?

Next time you meet someone, ask them what they use for their avatar. Share a Coke and see what that says about them. You should probably keep your observations to yourself, though -- at least until you exchange email addresses.

More facets of the same jewel

2009-01-23T14:15:00.004-05:00

I've posted several times now about the natural combination of my two hobbies -- the written word and videogames -- and how I can't seem to separate the two. During my brief but passionate stint in Second Life, I found myself in digital libraries holding digital book-readings. My ardor for the Final Fantasy series reached new heights when FFIII let me use weighty tomes as weapons. The codex-toting archaeologists in Lego Indy found themselves in heavier rotation than was really necessary. On the Rain-slick Precipice of Darkness features Tycho reading at all times, even when shooting evil in its grinning maw, and I just naturally had to unlock his super-weapon.

So, what about Warcraft? Oh yes, gentle reader, I have found a way.

When you're not killing things in Warcraft, you have a profession. That's right, a job in a fantasy world. Where's the fantasy in that, you ask? Well, my profession is Inscription. I make ink and write runes on scraps of paper. These "glyphs" have, unsurprisingly, magic properties, and I sell them for a more-than-tidy profit.

And, as if that wasn't enough, with the right training and some luck, a scribe like myself can make books. Big old grimoires that lend mighty powers to their holders. For example, I now carry around a book that lets my breathe fire. Fire breath! From holding a book! Marvelous.

The trouble is, sometimes my digital adventures creep into my waking life*. It's all I can do to take my bright, modern-feeling home office and redecorating it like this:

It's actually not all that far off, now that I think about it.

*videogames are far more restful for me than sleep. Ask around.

Little help

2009-01-17T10:32:00.001-05:00

Roadrunner has apparently decided to get rid for the web space for their customers. So, I am on the hunt for free/inexpensive web hosting. Advice?

Ten Clues I Hate About the Man

2009-01-14T20:18:00.001-05:00

So... this is Hamlet, right?

Once You Understand the Settings

2009-01-09T20:01:00.002-05:00

Now that I own a home, I need to develop some understanding of the tools used for its improvement. So far, only one makes sense to me.

Episode IV: A New Pad

2009-01-08T20:49:00.004-05:00

In an act seeping finality, I dropped off the keys to the old place on Lancaster tonight. The era of porching and bulldogs has closed forever. Home ownership seems to consist mainly of catching colds, checking that the doors are locked and buying the wrong thing at The Home Depot.

are for kids.

2009-01-02T11:27:00.001-05:00

Here's my latest review for Library Thing Early Reviewers program. Gladiatrix, or "One Woman's Inability to Have a Good Day".

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

2008-12-22T21:21:00.001-05:00

The move has been... let's call it "delayed". I'm sure that in years to come we will look back on the events of this week fondly, but right now no so much.

No really, I'm fine.

2008-12-18T00:06:00.001-05:00

This I can tell you: two nights before closing on a house is awfully close.

And now presenting...

2008-12-11T17:35:00.003-05:00

Did something last night I haven't done in ten years -- stood under the lights of the stage at the Marie Maday. Fortunately, I remembered to keep the lights in my eyes so as not to be distracted by the highly bored faces in the audience. That and my own actor move, frowning and shaking my head at everything the other characters say, made it a fairly painless experience.

One of the odd things about staged readings is the question of movement. Do you look at the other actors? Nudge, punch, etc?

Heh heh...

2008-12-10T12:19:00.001-05:00

Emphasis mine. CNN.com sure knows how to make you do a double-take.

Back to the croaking

2008-12-04T14:51:00.001-05:00

You’ll forgive me if I start this post with a quotation. Pulled from a recent book by a local writer, it describes his experience in setting up a new business, and I can’t help but find it very telling.

“There are croakers in every country, always boding its ruin. Such a one... said he was sorry for me… for [this] was a sinking place, the people already half-bankrupts, or near being so; all appearances to the contrary, such as new buildings and the rise of rents, being to his certain knowledge fallacious; for they were, in fact, among the things that would soon ruin us.... This man continued to live in this decaying place… refusing for many years to buy a house there, because all was going to destruction; and at last I had the pleasure of seeing him give five times as much for one as he might have bought it for when he first began his croaking.”

Now, allow me to clarify. The source of this abridged passage is founding father Benjamin Franklin’s widely-read autobiography. So when I say “a recent book by a local writer”, I mean “recent” compared to the sack of Troy and “local” compared to Addis Ababa. The city he describes is Philadelphia and the topic is the establishment of his legendary printing house.

All Buffalonians know their share of croakers, and even indulge in the occasional croak themselves. It’s difficult to resist. But the two examples Franklin gives of “appearances to the contrary” – new buildings and higher rents – can undoubtedly be seen here.

Five minutes clicking through BuffaloRising.com will bring up quite a few updates on new builds or conversions. The Federal Courthouse, an old Expo hotel, Rock Harbor, the new Burchfield Penney – feel free to append as many et ceteras as you like. Take a drive down-town and witness cranes actually putting buildings up. Not exactly the image of decay you hear from the croakers.

As for rent increase, I can only offer anecdotal evidence, as I’m sure you can yourself. But consider the following, which I gleaned from an email debate between a croaker and someone with a more realistic perspective:

In May, CNN Money listed Buffalo as the country’s fifth fastest-growing real estate market.
Forbes put us within the top 100 cities in which to get a job in 2008.
Newsweek lists City Honors as the #11 public school in the nation.

Spend an idle hour at buffaloniagara.org and find plenty of similar statistics, all of which certainly seem to be from unbiased third-parties.

Franklin gives plenty of advice in his autobiography, including that when positing an argument one should try to avoid definitive statements, that one should pad one’s statements with tempering “I believes” or “so I understands”. In this case, I will ignore this well-intended advice and state quite definitively that we should put a quick end to all of our self-defeating nonsense lest we end up like the man in Franklin’s parable. It’s not the snow that keeps people away from our fair city, it’s the croakers.

WBFO, #2 Finale

2008-12-02T16:33:00.002-05:00

The new WBFO listener commentary is up. 'Cause I know you guys NEVER get tired of hearing me prattle on.

Monday Link Love

2008-12-01T20:29:00.002-05:00

Now tell me this isn't cool. I'm glad we have reached a point as a society where we can search a limitless trove of knowledge before we've even finished a word. Why aren't we all Atlanteans yet?

WBFO, #2

2008-11-28T09:19:00.002-05:00

A slightly-less funereal version of the Aunt Mickey post is my latest WBFO listener commentary, which will be aired on Tuesday AM at 6 and 8:30. Further updates as events warrant.

Only a Matter of Time

2008-11-22T13:02:00.006-05:00

For some time now, my brothers have been my pathway to true geekiness. For example:

It was my desire to understand their ways that introduced me to Magic: The Gathering, with long-lasting results.
Pete gave me his copy of Record of Lodoss War, which was a first for me in many respects -- first time owning a full TV series, first anime in my collection and the first with subtitles.
It was at Morgan's apartment that I played my first round of 8-man Halo, prompting me to buy the Xbox and leading to a few of the geekiest things I've ever done, including holding a video game tourney as fund-raiser, manning Halo at a bachelor party, and participating in a game-inspired improv show.

It should come as no surprise, then, that when I learned that Pete is currently playing World of Warcraft, I decided to try out the demo. We're not really letter-writers, but we are certainly gamers -- perhaps this will give us a chance to hang out, right?

Well, let me tell you this. PA has it right once again. From what I can tell so far, the game is mainly a steady stream of tasks involving killing X number of Y monsters. Snooze.

Now, I assume that once the tedium of grinding is done and you actually team up with people, some coolness can occur. Except that people are a pain in the ass. So, we'll see.

Croakers

2008-11-16T15:28:00.002-05:00

Here's a snippet from His Autobiography by Benjamin Franklin.

There are croakers in every country, always boding its ruin. Such a one then lived in Philadelphia.... This gentleman, a stranger to me, stopt one day at my door, and asked me if I was the young man who had lately opened a new printing-house. Being answered in the affirmative, he said he was sorry for me, because it was an expensive undertaking, and the expense would be lost; for Philadelphia was a sinking place, the people already half-bankrupts, or near being so; all appearances to the contrary, such as new buildings and the rise of rents, being to his certain knowledge fallacious; for they were, in fact, among the things that would soon ruin us.... Had I known him before I engaged in this business, probably I never should have done it.

This man continued to live in this decaying place, and to declaim in the same strain, refusing for many years to buy a house there, because all was going to destruction; and at last I had the pleasure of seeing him give five times as much for one as he might have bought it for when he first began his croaking.

Sound like any towns you know?

Link-love

2008-11-14T20:52:00.003-05:00

A bit more link-love for you tonight.

Stumbled across Wordcount recently, a little app that list words by usage. And yes, I did contact the creator to see if his tool could be used to trend data for use in my continuing offensive against the word "iconic" (sorry Eric), but he replied in the negative. #47267, FYI.

reCAPTCHA is awesome. Take one of the more annoying aspects of modern life and use it for the advancement of mankind's great work.

See Me

2008-11-11T08:07:00.005-05:00

A few videos for the lot of you.

If you haven't been over to The Humanist yet, you should really watch this. A bit more impassioned than the approach I would take, but then isn't that always the case? The passage of proposition 8 in CA is yet another blot of the record of America, proving once again how far we have fallen from the immutable ideals laid out by our forefathers. For shame, California.

The complete Mysterious Explorations of Jasper Morello has been posted in excellent quality.

And most importantly, turn it up, man!

_________________

P.S. -- I just ran across an old favorite. I've watched about four minutes of West Wing in my viewing life, and this just happened to be a few of them.

And Good Luck.

2008-11-10T18:30:00.003-05:00

Looks like Obama beat me to the punch in becoming the first internet president. Change.gov sounds like a fine plan for doing what the nets were built for -- getting info from one person to another. I'm all for it. Also, seems like a fine way to tag people who might try anything untoward. And then, of course, it's only a matter of time before people start getting arrested for things they email to the President-Elect. And once some evil overlords take over, an extensive digital record of people's opinons can easily be scoured for dissenters. We'll have ourselves an old-timey central-government-fueled witch-hunt based on these emails.

Or blog posts.... dang it! Well, I've assumed since age seventeen that once the new order of hyper-christian dictators begins I'll be among the first on the block.

Of Dewey and Geneology

2008-10-29T22:47:00.004-05:00

Coughing one's way through the book-paper dust of an inherited library is a fine way to spend an evening, surely. When my father's Aunt Mickey decided to pack up the essentials and relocate to a home with fewer staircases, I did not -- could not -- understand how many books I was about to glean from her collection. The currency with which the elderly trade is bifold; possessions and the memories attached to them, and my wife Jess's and my reward for muscling Mickey along in her move is books.

Not all of them, not by the longest of shots. Aunt Mickey is a highly clever woman, the acuity of her speech never giving away her eighty-five years, and it would appear that the fountain of her continued youth is reading. As my wife tells it after days spent packing a life's worth of possessions into cardboard with the deftness only an Army-brat upbringing can teach, she owns at least ten times as many books as we do, and has read them all. Imagine that! Actually reading all the volumes in one's personal library.

I flicked through the boxes of books Aunt Mickey sent Jess home with every day, searching for arcane ISBN numbers in order to log them in my own unachievable task list and wondering what rubric she used to determine which would go to us and which to the "donate" pile. Why, exactly, did she feel that I specifically needed 'Robert's Rules of Order'? Why so many 70's-and-80's woman-power paperbacks? The musty pile surrounding me on the couch certainly represented the prism through which Aunt Mickey views us, and sleuthing out the whys made for a lusciously narcissistic diversion.

Corners of paper stick out from many of the books. Aunt Mickey did not just read her library, but continually annotated it. Scraps of notes in the horrific handwriting to which all in my family are heir can be found in a large percentage of the collection. Newspaper clippings have been folded into to the covers with the care of a film preservationist. Would you like to know the answer to Carroll's raven-and-writing-desk riddle? I've got it, tucked into the leaves of an annotated Alice. Images of Mickey sitting in her casually mod living room, gasping with interest at an article and describing it to my uncle as she tries to remember just where precisely that one book got to are now among my favorite non-participant memories.

Time spent with these books has given me an archaeological taste of my aunt's life and those of her family. One of my cousins went through a youthful period of UFO obsession in the sixties, for example. Somebody in the family studied more than a little French. A better argument for dating one's books cannot be made; a reading life like Mickey's could be measured in the tree-rings of the inside covers.

And what of when I am eighty-five? How will some great-nephew know my life? Through a pile of video games and check stubs? At the very least I can hope that my new acquisitions will provide a feeling of connection to family history and that my own library -- and life -- will be as worthy of interest.

A-men.

2008-10-25T19:14:00.003-05:00

Allow me to channel a little Humanist with some Saturday Site-Love for artofmanliness.com.

We all know that manliness has suffered greatly over the last 40 years. The causes of this descent into effeminacy are multifarious, but lingering on them brings us no closer to revivifying the near-dead corpus of Man. This site champions our cause. Want to learn how to shave like your grandfather? Take a little trip.

Turn on the TV for fifteen minutes and you'll see how much modern US society hates men. Every commercial and most shows depicts us as fat, slothful fools. It is our own fault -- as traditional gender roles were destroyed in the previous decades, instead of doing the correct thing and simply eliminating bias against women we unmanned ourselves, incorrectly associating our strengths with the evils of our forefathers.

The rising popularity of gentlemanly items like cuff-links is indicative of the fact that men yearn to return to the days when the positive aspects of our nature were encouraged and revered. So, man up.

A New Hope

2008-10-12T17:25:00.002-05:00

My crusade against the word "iconic" has been documented in part here on B A Start. I swear, not three days go by before I see it used. I refuse to believe this is due to some kind of increased awareness -- we all know it was Superman Returns.

I was doing some reading this afternoon and found a suitable replacement: paradigmatic. And this in an essay published in the Spring of 2007. Please, journalists bloggers and ad writers, start using this word as an alternate. I'm starting to lose it.

All I Need to Know I Learned from 'Big Trouble in Little China'.

2008-10-11T10:27:00.003-05:00

#1 - Independence is manly.
#2 - Muscle shirts are only to be worn by men who are a) jacked and b) pricks.
#3 - Childhood fears don't really go away.
#4 - Reporters find the need to put themselves into ludicrous amounts of danger to get something called a "scoop". Don't become a reporter.
#5 - You see a dude dressed in samurai gear, he's probably magic. Do not mess.
#6 - That group of old men who spend all their time playing some board game know something.
#7 - Next time someone throws a knife at you, just grab it out of the air and throw it back.
#8 - If given the option, leave Kim Catrall behind.

Morningstar

2008-10-08T22:46:00.000-05:00

It should come as no surprise to B A Starters that I am and always have been a fan of illustration made during the fifty years encircling the change of the prior millenium. I submit for your halloweeny enjoyment, this pic by Kay Nielsen.

I don't know what tale this is from, but damn if it doesn't look like Castlevania. And it's got the Nielsen big-canvas-small-subject thing going, which I always enjoy.

A bigger version here.

"Kun" is an honorific for boys

2008-10-06T21:25:00.003-05:00

I would like an explanation, and I would like it soon. Anyone want to tell me why Domokun is advertising Halloween for Target? How exactly did the lovable if mysterious mascot for NHK become the spokesperson for spooooky holidays here in the US? I, for one, am baffled.

I mean, I get it. Target has been doing their best to get all coolified, what with their off-mainstream music finds etc. Why not grab viral phenom Domo? He's cute, he's from Japan, geeks love him -- he's god damned perfect.

And yet, there's something a little odd about it.

Sure, part of the cool thing about Domo was that he wasn't well-known, but that's a fairly standard geek complaint when stuff gets out to the normies. I tell you what I find unsettling. Domo hatched in front of a TV screen and fell blindingly in love with it. The little fuzzy dude just can't get enough terebi. He's a TV mascot and he loves TV. Unlike here in the US, where our TV mascots encourage us to go outside and play.

So there he stands at Target, his gaping maw hoping to convince us to purchase halloween goodies for the kids, while secretly he's at best an addictive personality and and worst an utter sellout. I love Domo, and seeing him in a US advertisement gives me a bit of evil joy.

The RLTP Project, Part 6.

2008-09-26T23:14:00.001-05:00

A hearty thanks to all who decided to join in on the fun this Monday. People laughed, which is all I had hoped for. Succession!

So what's next? Now I do some tweaking and try to get the thing put on for reals.

The RLTP Project, Part 5.

2008-09-13T11:58:00.002-05:00

Today was the rehearsal for the reading on the 22nd, and I had a great time. The director managed to convince some very funny people to join in the fun, and they all got really into it. Geeks are funny, man.

The reading will be Sept 22nd at 7:30pm at the Road Less Traveled theater space and is open to the public. If you're interested in seeing (hearing?) The Alpha Geek, please feel free to come on down. Costumes encouraged.

Book Four: Air

2008-09-03T10:52:00.002-05:00

Avatar: The Last Airbender is over, but was clearly cut short. Here's how Book 4 should have gone:

One year after Fire Lord Zuko's ascension to the throne:

Aang, while living a life of quiet reflection in the Eastern Air Temple, sees a flying bison. This starts him on the search for the missing Air Nomads, who escaped the Fire Nation's wrath by
disappearing beyond the known boundaries of the world. In the last 102 years, they have retreated from earthly concerns, and Aang must convince them to return in order to finalize his life's work of restoring balance. Katara goes with him, despite Aang's insistence that she not.

Ozai bargains with Zuko, offering information on his mother's location in exchange for a 'house arrest' arrangement on the family estate on Ember Island. Zuko, still learning how to be a softy, agrees. Ursa has taken refuge in a murky cave behind a waterfall in the Southern Water Kingdom, where firebending is nearly impossible. The precise location of this place is known only to the Dai Lee, as it is one of a network of hideouts they have established across the globe. Zuko, bored with palace life and a moron, decides to go himself. He appoints Mei as steward in what he believes will be a short absence.

With the Avatar and the Fire Lord now distracted, a group of Ozai loyalists (including the YuuYan archers) takes advantage of the situation and free Ozai. Oops. They embark on a mission to capture the Avatar equivalent of the nuke -- crazy Azula, who has been locked up far from civilization.

Zuko travels to the Ba Sing Se, where Toth has reconciled with her family and set up a school to teach metalbending. He meets with Iroh, who has set up his tea shop and has no interest in adventures. As the Blue Spirit, he sneaks into Dai Lee Central and steals the map of their hidden bases. He realizes they are all linked by narrow passages which can be navigated only by earthbenders. The Earth Kingdom could potentially move people -- or troops -- throughout the world unhindered. Huh. Zuko enlists Toth's help to move speedily to his mother's cave.

A happy reconciliation, and a stop over to see Sokka, who is hard at work rebuilding the Southern Water Kingdom with his father.

Just then, of course, Ozai makes his move. Easily overpowering Mei, he reinstates himself as Fire Lord, assuming that without the Avatar, Zuko cannot get to him. Trouble is, the Earth King has decided that the Fire Kingdom needs to be destroyed to ensure that they never pull a world-dominance stunt again. He unleashes his armies through the tunnel system and battles rage throughout the Fire Kingdom.

Zuko, Toth, and Sokka race back to the action, picking up Suki and the Kyoshi Warriors along the way. They mount a stealth mission to recapture Ozai in hopes that Zuko's reinstatement would calm the Earth King.

All this time, Aang has been searching the hinterlands, proving himself to the Air Nomads, and bickering with Katara. Just when all seems lost back home, he and his people fly in and stop the violence. Zuko reclaims the throne. Everybody goes home.

Why Japanese?

2008-09-02T11:02:00.005-05:00

It started with, of all things, Rock Band. As my efficacy at the drums improved, I considered practicing. Twenty minutes a day, say. Keep that up, and I'd be rocking on Expert all the time.

After spending the briefest of moments entertaining this clack-and-roll fantasy, reason stamped it out. What a waste of time! Twenty minutes a day, and to what end? Better fake rocking? I might as well learn an actual instrument.

Hey, wait a second...

Thus began the next stage: an ephemeral question of whether or not I should take up an instrument. I played the baritone horn in high school to little effect, so at least I can read music. I can spare twenty minutes a day, certainly. The violin? Perhaps the ocarina?

This concept went fairly quickly by the wayside. Not to worry though -- I found another way to spend this hitherto unused twenty minutes. (No, it's not exercise.)

I heard this story on NPR, and the phrasing of a certain sentence caught my ear. Jefferson read several languages. Now there's a thought. The guy probably didn't speak German all that well, but he could read it.

This baked for a while until it combined with the previous thoughts and came out of the oven something new: time to learn a language.

Now being both a videogame geek and a lingustics geek, Japanese was the only choice.

Lost in his own museum

2008-08-27T21:14:00.003-05:00

Not all that long ago I was hooked by a game that allowed me to play as a character who liked books. Now I find myself deep into LEGO Indy, in which archaeologist characters can get by certain puzzles by decrypting hieroglyphs. They carry books around. I... I just can't stop.

Old Habits

2008-08-26T22:33:00.000-05:00

Sometimes, you just have to rock out the LEGOs.

Cosplay Revisit

2008-08-19T16:45:00.002-05:00

I know I just posted about cosplay the other day, but here's another note on the topic. Why stop at clothing when you can change your physical appearance? This post describes contact lenses made ot make the iris unusually large, as in anime large.

Also, fuck yeah.

Be Free!

2008-08-18T17:00:00.003-05:00

So, I've been wondering how Debo's move to Phoenix has been going. Twitter is helpful certainly, but little did I know his journey would be featured in today's Golden age Comic Book Stories post of all places.

Looks like it's going long just fine.

You did, Tommy. You did,

2008-08-13T17:42:00.002-05:00

Now, I've never been to the self-proclaimed America's Fair, so I suppose I shouldn't judge. I will tell you, though, that an event which features both pig races and slot machines just doesn't sound like my thing.

Of course, if this is going on, I may just have to swing in.

BBBBQB: Vindication

2008-08-11T17:43:00.001-05:00

Great news! BBQ Beef, which was withheld from us for so long, has returned! Perhaps this was all simply a ploy to make us appreciate the delectation all the more.

Apologeia Cosplaea

2008-08-10T10:10:00.004-05:00

Revising the play, and this has given me cause to reflect on that most geeky of pastimes -- cosplay.

While I do enjoy Halloween more than most, I recognize that dressing up in character for a movie premiere or other geek event crosses the line of normalcy. Too bad, really. People went crazy trying to dress up like newly Jetted Brett Favre, and no one seems to mind.

Sure, more often than not cosplay, as evidenced by these pics from comic-con, ends up with scrawny guys trying to look like super-soldiers ...

fat men dressed as super-soldiers....

and women dressed in utter teenage-geek-fantasy skantitude...

but sometimes the hobby/obsession can yield some impressive recreations.

The trouble is that comics and video-games, being visual media, are of course going to depict impossibly good-looking people in physically improbable clothing. You can dress your average person up like Green Lantern all you want, but it's going to look strange unless he's body-builder with plastic sprayed on his skin. And even then.

The Japanese Project Part I

2008-08-07T20:13:00.002-05:00

Holy crap learning Japanese is hard.

So, there are four different alphabets. One is based in the Latin alphabet, which is nice, but it's only used to communicate with stupid gaijin like myself. There are two phonetic alphabets, one of which is only used for words imported from other languages. (After what date, I'm not sure). But the main alphabet is pretty much only used in kindergarten books, since the inscrutable kanji make up most of the written language.

To add to the fun, there are four different levels of formality in speech, and the grammatical rules apparently change for each. Awesome.

Updates

2008-08-06T16:44:00.002-05:00

Greenfern was featured in an article on Buffalo Rising, which is the closest thing to publicity we've managed so far. Not a strictly accurate article, but any word is good word, right?

9/22 is that date of the RLTP reading of The Alpha Geek, which should be an enlightening experience. I mean, you can write this stuff, but can you say it?

I've started teaching myself Japanese. More updates later.

End of line.

The RLTP Project, Part 4

2008-07-29T18:17:00.002-05:00

We're rapidly approaching the next phase in the project, the one where actual actors get up and do a reading of the play. The director emailed me today to discuss, and asked me this question:

If I were to select 4or 5 sci-fi or fantasy movies to watch as dramaturgical research - what would they be?

Holy crap! Now there's a question for the ages. My response below:

Certainly LOTR and Star Wars. I recommend the Sci-Fi Channel's mini-series Dune (not the movie from the 70's). Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within is a good, accessible anime movie based on a well-known Japanese video game series. For fantasy, Stardust and Willow are both fun watches. There is a Dungeons and Dragons movie which I did not watch, but may be good for research purposes. Also, there is a documentary called Trekkies about the extreme end of hard-core Star Trek geekdom about which I've heard nothing but positive reviews and certainly depicts the kind of people we're talking about.

*snif* I'm so proud. An acolyte of my very own!

Smells like Dork Spirit

2008-07-26T11:04:00.004-05:00

OK, ladies. Looking for a way to attract the attentions of a book-lover like myself? Try this perfume. Guaranteed to turn the pencil-necked heads of owl-eyed Classics majors everywhere. I'll be honest -- I don't think I can be expected to be held accountable for my actions if I smell this on someone, so if you want avoid a tawdry night of discussion on Sir Orfeo, use it with care.

Jump back and forth

2008-07-25T17:55:00.001-05:00

I quite unexpectedly felt genuine chills at one point in this BBC Olympics ad. If there were any doubts left that Jamie Hewlitt is mega-talented, please put them to rest.

Home for a Rest

2008-07-24T16:55:00.002-05:00

Yep, still ludicrously busy. Not quite Garvey busy, but close.

Extrey extrey

2008-07-22T17:12:00.003-05:00

Greenfern can now be found at Talking Leaves on Elmwood. Met with good ol' Alicia today to get everything set. Here's hoping I edited everything well.

With lots of bubbles.

2008-07-19T07:49:00.002-05:00

Stealing a few moments for a quick post. Allow me to give you some movie ratings.

The Squid and the Whale. Thumbs-down.
Good Night and Good Luck. Thumbs patriotically up.
Batman: Gotham Knight. Thumbs up.
The Dark Knight. Thumbs (yawn... excuse me) up.
Jumper: Rock horns up accompanied by a slow head nod.
Appleseed Ex Machina: Thumbs unsurprisingly down.

I Live.

2008-07-11T16:26:00.002-05:00

Yes, I am still alive. Busy busy busy of late. A few updates.

Issue #1 of Greenfern Magazine is now complete. The process of distribution and marketing begins now. Interested in one? Send an email over to greenfernmag@gmail.com.

I have been playing as much FF3 as I can fit in. I mean, one of the jobs is Scholar, and he attacks people with books. How am I supposed to resist that?

My new job is not a cake job. So stop saying that.

The RLTP Project, Parts 2 and 3

2008-06-28T09:34:00.002-05:00

The main concern was that non-geeks wouldn't find it funny. As it turns out, they were OK with it. Packing the text with references to Dune and The Lord of the Rings struck me as risky, but the group didn't seem to mind.

One of the plays we covered last week used 9-11 as a backdrop. It wasn't about 9-11, just about fictional events that took place at the same time. As you can imagine, this got the group talking. A lot. So the question is, is it too soon? Is seven years not enough distance?

BBBBQB Continued

2008-06-22T16:36:00.003-05:00

For those of you who are not blogddicted enough to read comments, I received the following anonymous response to my previous post:

While the BBQ Beef is a No-Show this year, I hear from trusted sources the Mighty Taco is about to launch a new menu item on the 30th of June that is going to please the stomachs of many in Buffalo. I can't wait too taste it myself!!!!

Hmmm.... I offer now an open letter to this mystery commenter.

Dear Anonymous,

Thank you for your interest in the plight of Mighty lovers. I was delighted to receive your comment, especially the words "this year". What this phrase implies is that our beloved BBQ beef may return in the future. Please feel free to share my opinion with your trusted sources.

The beginning of BBQ beef season is a well-honored holiday in my household and in those of a large percentage of my friends. Few can deny that the delectable seasonal menu item is among the -- if not the -- tastiest offered by Mighty. Just last night, as a discussion was held bemoaning the plight of the BBQ-lover this year, it was called the best food produced locally. Never mind spiced chicken remnants; BBQ beef is tops.

While I am sure the new menu item will compare with the majority of the Mighty menu, I will be truly amazed if it provides the level of enjoyment which has been denied to us. I look forward to BBQ beef's return next year, which will be received with great joy across the city.

Yours,
Alex

BBBBQB

2008-06-21T17:40:00.002-05:00

I was just informed by a polite if laconic Mighty Taco employee that there is to be no Barbecue Beef. So, the price of gas makes travel prohibitive, food prices are up, a new cigarette tax further vilifies my kind, and now there's no BBQ beef. What a time to be alive.

Keep the Apocalypse British!

2008-06-15T08:34:00.004-05:00

So, the Brits deploy a big ol' computer defense system which is sure to decide the best way to fulfill its' programming and ensure peace is to end all human life and they actually name it Skynet?

Hail to the Me

2008-06-14T15:02:00.001-05:00

Did I tell you guys I'm running for president? Well, I am.

Forward

2008-06-13T16:42:00.000-05:00

A post on webshite? Believe it.

Why do we fall?

2008-06-12T17:39:00.002-05:00

I present to you, gentle reader, a series of events.

I receive clearance to grow a beard.
I grow said beard.
I am informed politely that the aforementioned beard is leaning towards the scruffy direction.
I buy a beard trimmer.
The beard is trimmed by Yours Truly.
I notice that my hair is also a tad on the scruffy side.
The hair is trimmed by Yours Truly.

So, if you're wondering why on this sweet Earth I look like a cross between a mange-ridden chipmunk and a young Maeve Garvey, consider this mystery solved.

Random book stuff

2008-05-31T10:42:00.004-05:00

I can't tell if I'm obsessed with literature, knowledge, or just books. It might just be books. Not bookbinding or typography, just books. On shelves, in stacks, under chairs, wherever -- a row of spines always grabs my attention. So much potential there, so much information just waiting for my ready eye.

It should come as no surprise then that this post, entitled Hot Library Smut, really gets me going.

I've seen images of the Trinity College Library before, but only because of my lasting interest in Star Wars and the book-geek scandal of the Jedi library. Seriously, check the link.

While we're on the topic of fictional libraries, the Sandman series features the best I can come up with. The library in the Dreaming has not only ever book ever written, but ever book ever dreamed of. That novel you're thinking about penning? It's in there.

Lastly, it seems I am out of the running for the Early Reviewers program. I have been denied for several months running now. Alas -- but at least I won't have to read awful books anymore.

Again I say 'Fie'!

2008-05-24T10:27:00.002-05:00

While we're on the topic of my perennially late ideas, I think it's worth noting that the title of my play is 'The Alpha Geek". The plural form of this happens to be the title of an op-ed column printed in yesterday's New York Times by a gentle looking fellow in a pink shirt.

Dang it!

The RLTP Project, Part 1

2008-05-21T18:07:00.002-05:00

I've never been too keen on the idea of a writer's workshop. The image is somewhere between an AA meeting and a slumber party, neither event being something I have attended to date and neither being something I think I would enjoy. That being stated, I have also never had a piece of creative writing published. So, perhaps it is time to ingest some pride and give it a go.

I wrote a play last year, and now am a part of this year's Road Less Traveled Productions new play workshop. A dozen folks are going to read each others plays and then see them read by in-the-flesh actors. Mine happens to be up first, so at least I'll get that out of the way fast.

The play is an experiment of sorts, taking the timeworn standards of the Mistaken Identity plot and the Comedy of Manners (capitalization added for the appearance of maximum intellectualousity) and testing them out in the world of geekery. Boy Meets Girl at a sci-fi convention.

Now, I had a fine time writing this and even think it may have some funniness to it at points, but having people far more literate than myself evaluate it? Read it aloud? Goodness gracious me.

Inevitable.

2008-05-17T16:50:00.003-05:00

My latest fiction endeavor has been a steampunk serial in which victorian age Britain has made space travel possible via the invention of ether propulsion. Been working on the story for 6 months or so.

I just discovered Larklight, which the Wik describes as follows: Larklight is set in an alternate Victorian era universe, where mankind has been exploring the solar system since the time of Isaac Newton.

Dang it! Missed the aether-boat again!

Now that's better.

2008-05-12T17:05:00.002-05:00

OK. I compared the Telegraph list to the books I have in collections, anthologies, etc, and the real total is 35. Take that, Saldanha!

Just to check notes

2008-05-11T15:13:00.002-05:00

A recent article in the Telegraph provides a list of the 110 books which make up "the perfect library". Definitely worth a read.

Since I am a book geek, I set up an LT library to compare with my own.

Apparently I only own eighteen (outside of stuff in anthologies etc). For shame!

You really do always come back!

2008-05-09T17:35:00.003-05:00

The next season of Avatar: the Last Airbender is on its way. All i have to say is withhold your knocking until you have tried it.

Book 'em

2008-05-05T18:25:00.003-05:00

I'm beginning to sense a trend when it comes to the Early Reviewers program at Library Thing. I haven't been OKed for a book since The 13th Reality. Of course, the fact that my last review was roughly ten words probably doesn't help by odds.

One of the books this time around in Anathem by Neal Stephenson. Based on my collection, I think I have a decent chance. I'll keep you posted.

Yeehaw.

2008-04-27T11:17:00.002-05:00

I've done the math, and if gas reached five dollars per gallon, it would more cost-effective for me to own a horse. Sure, convincing the places I go that horse-parking is OK may take some doing, but it would be worth it.

The Racism Post

2008-04-23T18:42:00.003-05:00

In Which the Blogger Goes There

I sincerely wish that we could look back on racism and laugh. In a time when high-schoolers have never lived a moment of their lives without the faceless internet, one might think the concept that you can tell what a person is going to do by looking at them would be over, a relic, a foolish notion of our ancestors. Like the divine right of kings or war being good for the health.

Alas, no. The practice of categorizing people based on ethnic lines still thrives, and not just with the aged, at whom we can shake our heads and say they don't know any better, but with everyone. Racism, like the inalienable human rights we claim, seems to recognize no boundaries,

Part of the issue stems from ethnic pride, of all places. We wave our foreign flags, toast in the few non-English words we know, and tell our children that the nationality of our forefathers is superior to the others. Our food is the best. We built this country. Our noble ancestors did this or that great thing, and our fellow Blankians (where blank is some race, creed, or nationality) conduct affairs in the best way possible. Not like those other people.

By aligning ourselves with things we did not do, with a history we took no part in creating, we put ourselves and our children into a category. And if we're in one, everyone else must be as well.

Another source of the persistence of racism is far more wide-reaching than holiday bluster. Turn on your TV and see how Obama is doing with white Catholics. Go to work and talk to the marketing people about their strategies for the urban vs. suburban markets. Institutions which make their living based on what people choose perpetuate the concept that groups of individuals can be fit into tidy, preordained boxes.

On one side, this is nonsense. Chaos theory can't predict the movements of caribou – why would statistics predict what free-thinking humans will do? The trouble is, on the other side this makes perfect sense. Of course people from the same background who live in the same neighborhood, attend the same church, send their children to the same school will tend to do some of the same things. As social beings, we feed off of each other, learning our language and behaviors from those surrounding us.

So, fine. Some tendencies of pockets of people can be predicted. I'm from New England and I drink too much. As all animals do, we learn. Last time I touched a porcupine, I ended up with these weird needles stuck in my hand – best not do that again. So, if the first few times I see people from New England they're drunk, I learn.

As an employer, then, should I assume that if I see UVM on a resume I should not hire this person? I mean, they'll be late all the time nursing that hangover.

But people aren't porcupines. Plenty of people in New England don't drink at all. We've all met Irishmen that have never been in a fight, Italians without mafia connections, anglos that can dance, Latinos that aren't emotional, etc.

That last bit raised an eyebrow, yes? We have no problems discussing the irish, italians, and anglos, but throw in a protected class and the racism-ometer spikes, doesn't it? And not because we're afraid someone might hear us, but because we're afraid we might be tagged as racists and lose our jobs.

This seems unfair. It's not. When our parents were kids, a few black guys tried to go to college and the National Guard had to show up. When our elderly remember their grandparents, they remember people who lived with – and fought a war over – the concept that people from Africa were better off living as Christian chattel than pagan free men. If asking people to tip-toe around a few issues is all it takes to bring our nation closer to the vision laid out in the Declaration, then too bad. Next time you swell with pride over the accomplishments of your ancestors, consider a little political correctness to be the payment. I know you never owned any slaves; you didn't fight in WWII either.

Any time we give the government the right to decide what people can and cannot say or think, we should get very nervous. A watchful eye must be kept on this, to be sure, but until we stop both individually and institutionally classifying people into genera based on tannin-level, it is for the best.

Not with a bang, but with a whimper.

2008-04-19T15:42:00.002-05:00

I start a new job Monday, a new position within the same company. This has been coming for quite some time, and while I understood it intellectually, the emotional wallop of passing my life's work on to another person did not hit home until I moved my stuff.

I wrote an article for Artvoice a while back on how to decorate one's office/cubicle, a subtle art to be sure. Just what does one want to represent? And how to do this? For now, my trappings are all hidden away. As I assert myself in the new space with time, though, these question will raise themselves again.

Hey! Listen!

2008-04-16T16:53:00.003-05:00

Allow me to geek out for a moment. I share with a life-long obsession: familiars.

I don't know what else to call them really. Pet-like little guys that fly around your shoulders and help you with stuff. These are, of course, completely fictional to date.

I believe it started with Tron. That little Bit guy (in Spanish below) flitting about left a serious imprint on my young geek sensibilities.

Years went by, and as a college graduate I played The Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time. Widely considered the best game ever created, many people criticize Navi, Link's constant counterpart. Yes, perhaps her persistent wheedling can get a little annoying, but she certainly fits the bill as a familiar, and thus I love her.

Not geeky enough? OK, fine. Once I got an Xbox, the mysteries of Halo became my playthings, including 343 Guilty Spark. A lunatic librarian made by an long-dead alien race. How could I not go for that?

Still not satisfied? My favorite of all time is Bao-dur's remote from KOTOR2. It's a Jedi training remote familiar. FEEL THE AWESOMITUDE!

Now, what's a boy to do? Essentially, what I'm dreaming of here is a flying, voice-activated iPhone with a great AI system and a personality.

Well, seeing how this would require a level of tinkering far beyond my own, obviously the only option is to build my own steampunk familiar in Second Life. And yes, Sparky the etherworks pet is coming along just fine, thank you for asking.

Mean, mean pride

2008-04-10T22:02:00.002-05:00

Has anyone else noticed how many songs from Rockband are on the radio?

Sure, it might be an increased awareness thing, but following Gimme Shelter with Tom Sawyer just smacks of a bit more than coincidence.